Last week, I spent a day and a half at the University College of the Cayman Islands (UCCI) taking in some great keynote speakers and some enlightening sessions from local and international presenters during the 2nd International Conference on Leadership, Governance and Empowerment in the Caribbean. It was great to see that the conference had a regional focus to it as I feel sometimes Cayman focuses too much inward and not enough on the region it is a part of - the Caribbean.
Hands down, one of the best sessions I took in was entitled Youth Perspectives on Leadership and Governance and the onlookers were treated to a presentation from a couple students from the UWI campus in Jamaica, and then Felix Manzanares, youth student leader and pastor, and Richard Christian, who is the Young UDP co-leader.
It was great to see the passion and the energy that these youth showed and demonstrated in their presentations. I was impressed with it and excited to see it. I feel most of the crowd (which packed the room so it was standing room only) was captivated by the emotion and engagement of the speakers.
One of the things that I noticed was that the youth was decrying the lack of leadership in the current political leaders in the country and that if youth was asked to be involved or consulted for input, it was more a token action, rather than a genuine interest and act to involve youth in the political decision-making process. This has led to a disinterest and a cynicism of the political process. Disenfranchisement of the youth of Cayman. I interpreted this feeling to have generated from this form of tokenism or flat out ignoring their voice.
A highlight for me was the idealism and principle-centred messages coming from the young Caymanians. They were standing tall for honor, integrity, and service from political leaders. It was refreshing to see. I hope, I really really hope, that these individuals will stand tall and be leaders in the political arena in the future, but not leaders following the paths of the present. We need the youth to be transformational leaders! Leaders who will question the current ways and systems, and serve the community and society first, and elevate ALL of Cayman, not just the wealthy and corporate interests. We can all hope and champion the youth to be the answer to Cayman's woes and political and socioeconomic inequities.
At the end of the session, I tapped Felix on the shoulder, and passed him a note. The note had a book by Robert Greenleaf entitled "Servant Leadership" and I also shared with him the name Kent Keith who has really pushed the concept of servant leadership forward. It was introduced in the 1960s but has really began to gain centre stage in the business and leadership guru community. So much so that a lot of leadership and business experts such as Stephen Covey, Robin Sharma and Peter Drucker have all spoke of the need to lead by serving first and foremost.
The Moment...
I am excited for the future leaders of this country and I hope they will maintain the idealism and servant mentality that is so important for political and civil servants to have to really make an impact to benefit ALL of this country's people. Youth leaders such a Felix and Richard are standing at a fork in the road, between choosing to be real leaders for this country or just another follower of the old, and ineffective, ways of political and social actors. I hope they stand tall for service, principles and change for the betterment of all. Stay strong my friends and take this moment to decide what leaders you really are.
Welly out...
Thursday, March 24, 2011
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Linkin Music to Life
Linkin Park - A Thousand Suns
I have recently started listening to this album and I enjoy the mix of the sound with the lyrics. Each song brings something to the table and is unique in its message, and delivers that message differently each time. I really have dug this album for the last few weeks and find myself really stuck on it. If you haven't, you should check this album out. You will likely enjoy it, even if you aren't a fan of the genre.
One thing that I find really powerful is music. I know that when I feel down, the type of music I play will either help me or keep me down. Recently, I have been really dealing with some life changing events and decisions that will need to be made. How I have dealt with the mental, emotional and physical roller coaster of stress during this time has been aided greatly by music. If I have felt down, I pop in something that has a positive vibe to it and that will uplift me and make me feel better. I may even put on a song like, "When They Come For Me" that, to me anyways, sounds like a person who has defied the odds and risen above the crowd and been his own person. That gives me the strength at times to feel like I can overcome whatever may come my way and helps me push forward with my life plan.
Music is important to me. It breathes life into my life. Let it motivate you, inspire you and help you move forward. Pick your music wisely and feel it work its magic.
Feel free to leave a comment on how music has impacted your life and how you use it in your life. I would love to hear about it.
QUOTE: "Whether you prevail or fail, endure or die, depends more on what you do to yourself than on what the world does to you." ~ Jim Collins
Yes, I have used this one before, but it is too good to not repeat.
Welly out!
Sunday, January 23, 2011
Sunday Beach Musings...
I have to admit, I am quite fortunate to be able to look out over the warm Caribbean Sea from a white sandy beach every Sunday afternoon with my daughter Leila. For last few weeks, we have made this our father-daughter ritual, and so far it has been amazing for both of us. She gets to spend time playing in the sand and water, running into the odd friend she knows, and gets to have fun outside like every 6 year old child should. I, on the other hand, get to relax, spend time chatting with friends who usually drop in to see us, and think over whatever comes to my mind.
Today was an eventful day as the local Catholic Church had a beach BBQ capped off with games for all the children who attended. The playing area was less than 2 feet from our lounging area on the beach and was full of balloon tosses, soccer games and tug of wars. Also, Sunday is the beach volleyball league's game day so there was lots of activity. Nevertheless, I got to see and think a lot of things over between all of this and the company of Jeremy and Sam, who joined us after we arrived.
It is what it is: I, just like most people I know, know their own culture and its values while being somewhat ignorant of different cultures and how they may see things. Recently, I met a friend who had helped me through quite a number of challenging situations. She was great at lifting me when I thought I wasn't going to stay afloat, giving good advice when I needed it, and making me laugh when I thought I couldn't possibly feel happy again. She was a ray of light for me in dark times. I don't believe in one-sided friendships, so I gave her support which I thought I could do best. I helped her with trying to plan out her career path, work advice, and offered support when she felt down and unsure of herself in anyway. Naturally, when you both share deeply, you tend to get closer and want to spend time with each other. However, both of us have realized that our cultures do not see our friendship in the same way - and this has caused problems for us going forward. For example, her culture does not see a male-female relationship as something that is appropriate for a woman who is in a relationship. This is evident as she feels pressured by others who have saw her spending time with me as they will see this as a negative characteristic in her and something that a "woman shouldn't do with another man" despite the complete absence of any wrongdoing and it being 100 percent innocent. She told me this and said that because of her culture, she does not think she can spend as much time with me or be seen with me. At first I was a little hurt by this as one would be when a friend pulls back from a relationship. You feel dejected and put out. However, she understands how it could be seen and how it could hurt her relationship with her partner. That's understandable to me that she would not want to jeopardize her relationship. If she loves that person, she should do what she has to do to keep that safe and protected.
On the other hand though, you have to see it as society making something out of nothing. One thing I have found is that people love to talk. They will talk about anything, talk about nothing, and talk for talk sakes. Call it gossip if you want. Sometimes it is innocent, as someone will share some news with another person. Other times, it is said with a purpose and an ill one at that. Now I feel society likes to make more out of a friendship between a man and a woman. It is like a man and woman, in society's wisdom, can only have a sexual relationship, where both are unable to defend themselves from the wiles of the other! Society paints a man like a bumbling fool, someone who cannot say no to any carnal urge, while a woman is a siren, waiting to seduce a man into her trap. I think this is absolute hogwash. People make their own choices and decide which desires to follow and which are not 'right'. Regardless of a friendship being man-to-man, woman-to-woman or man-to-woman, any such relationship has just as much likelihood of being more or less based on sexual attraction. But society would have us think otherwise.
However, it is what it is. I have resigned myself to the fact that what I spoke of above is especially true of her culture. My culture is somewhat less enslaved to this archaic concept of appropriateness, but still people like to make it mean more than what it is if they see it too. Out of respect to her, I will honour her wishes and let this friendship slide its way towards acquaintanceship. I will miss it, but it is what it is.
Assumptions...: I really like the saying, "it is what it is." Sam told me today that it is a very Canadian saying. Maybe she is right. I heard it from a counselor I am seeing about a month ago. It is so beautiful because it is simple. Yet, it is one of the hardest things for people to do. Instead of taking things for what they are, people think that there must be some ulterior motive, or that they have to read between the lines. This leads to a beautiful thing called - assumptions. Getting back to the above point, assumptions are what is limiting a friendship. Assumptions on what is appropriate for friends who are of opposite sexes to be doing. Honestly, I joke all the time that my first name is unisex, but maybe deep down inside, it is a bit of a poke at gender identity which has been socialized into our cultures. Girls wear pink... boys wear blue... girls like dolls.... while boys play with action figures... the list could go on and on! But why do these things matter! Well, if a boy plays with dolls and wears pink, society will assume that he is like gay and will paint him with the flaming brush, not matter what the boy truly feels is his sexual orientation. Dolls + pink + boy = gay. It is straight assumption math, my dear Watson. It is too bad society, and the people who drive these stereotypes, can't sit back and say to themselves, "it is what it is".... "it is a boy who likes dolls and prefers pink." Nothing more, nothing less. I hope one day we can all take a step back from the baggage claim, as Jason Barger would say, and reexamine what we label as what and how we make assumptions based on what we THINK we see and THINK we know. It is what it is i guess.
Relationships: One thing the beach did show me was the power of spending time with those we care about. It was evident all around me that people were truly happy spending time with one another. Nothing else would have brought them as much happiness at that moment. I saw friends laughing and playing sports together, a mother and son teamed up in a water balloon toss game, and family sat around and shared stories and remembered all of the other times they laughed together, sure to add this memory to their repertoire. Relationships are processes, you must stay at them to make them work. If you take them for granted, you will lose them and those you care the most about. Sometimes relationships change, for better or worse, but it is up to each person to make the best out of what they can. If a relationship is unhealthy, you work to make it healthy for both. If you cannot, then you must walk away. Period. I know I have a renewed sense of appreciation for relationships and what they mean. Today on the beach reminded me of this. Also, I really do hope my friendship above can be maintained, but I am happy to see it change if it makes it the best it can be for the both of us.
I hope this was a coherent rant, for it was a rant. You can't call it anything else. At the very least, I hope you didn't feel it was a waste of a few minutes. I know it helps me to get this out, so maybe it will help someone else if they read it... :)
Welly's out for another day...
Today was an eventful day as the local Catholic Church had a beach BBQ capped off with games for all the children who attended. The playing area was less than 2 feet from our lounging area on the beach and was full of balloon tosses, soccer games and tug of wars. Also, Sunday is the beach volleyball league's game day so there was lots of activity. Nevertheless, I got to see and think a lot of things over between all of this and the company of Jeremy and Sam, who joined us after we arrived.
It is what it is: I, just like most people I know, know their own culture and its values while being somewhat ignorant of different cultures and how they may see things. Recently, I met a friend who had helped me through quite a number of challenging situations. She was great at lifting me when I thought I wasn't going to stay afloat, giving good advice when I needed it, and making me laugh when I thought I couldn't possibly feel happy again. She was a ray of light for me in dark times. I don't believe in one-sided friendships, so I gave her support which I thought I could do best. I helped her with trying to plan out her career path, work advice, and offered support when she felt down and unsure of herself in anyway. Naturally, when you both share deeply, you tend to get closer and want to spend time with each other. However, both of us have realized that our cultures do not see our friendship in the same way - and this has caused problems for us going forward. For example, her culture does not see a male-female relationship as something that is appropriate for a woman who is in a relationship. This is evident as she feels pressured by others who have saw her spending time with me as they will see this as a negative characteristic in her and something that a "woman shouldn't do with another man" despite the complete absence of any wrongdoing and it being 100 percent innocent. She told me this and said that because of her culture, she does not think she can spend as much time with me or be seen with me. At first I was a little hurt by this as one would be when a friend pulls back from a relationship. You feel dejected and put out. However, she understands how it could be seen and how it could hurt her relationship with her partner. That's understandable to me that she would not want to jeopardize her relationship. If she loves that person, she should do what she has to do to keep that safe and protected.
On the other hand though, you have to see it as society making something out of nothing. One thing I have found is that people love to talk. They will talk about anything, talk about nothing, and talk for talk sakes. Call it gossip if you want. Sometimes it is innocent, as someone will share some news with another person. Other times, it is said with a purpose and an ill one at that. Now I feel society likes to make more out of a friendship between a man and a woman. It is like a man and woman, in society's wisdom, can only have a sexual relationship, where both are unable to defend themselves from the wiles of the other! Society paints a man like a bumbling fool, someone who cannot say no to any carnal urge, while a woman is a siren, waiting to seduce a man into her trap. I think this is absolute hogwash. People make their own choices and decide which desires to follow and which are not 'right'. Regardless of a friendship being man-to-man, woman-to-woman or man-to-woman, any such relationship has just as much likelihood of being more or less based on sexual attraction. But society would have us think otherwise.
However, it is what it is. I have resigned myself to the fact that what I spoke of above is especially true of her culture. My culture is somewhat less enslaved to this archaic concept of appropriateness, but still people like to make it mean more than what it is if they see it too. Out of respect to her, I will honour her wishes and let this friendship slide its way towards acquaintanceship. I will miss it, but it is what it is.
Assumptions...: I really like the saying, "it is what it is." Sam told me today that it is a very Canadian saying. Maybe she is right. I heard it from a counselor I am seeing about a month ago. It is so beautiful because it is simple. Yet, it is one of the hardest things for people to do. Instead of taking things for what they are, people think that there must be some ulterior motive, or that they have to read between the lines. This leads to a beautiful thing called - assumptions. Getting back to the above point, assumptions are what is limiting a friendship. Assumptions on what is appropriate for friends who are of opposite sexes to be doing. Honestly, I joke all the time that my first name is unisex, but maybe deep down inside, it is a bit of a poke at gender identity which has been socialized into our cultures. Girls wear pink... boys wear blue... girls like dolls.... while boys play with action figures... the list could go on and on! But why do these things matter! Well, if a boy plays with dolls and wears pink, society will assume that he is like gay and will paint him with the flaming brush, not matter what the boy truly feels is his sexual orientation. Dolls + pink + boy = gay. It is straight assumption math, my dear Watson. It is too bad society, and the people who drive these stereotypes, can't sit back and say to themselves, "it is what it is".... "it is a boy who likes dolls and prefers pink." Nothing more, nothing less. I hope one day we can all take a step back from the baggage claim, as Jason Barger would say, and reexamine what we label as what and how we make assumptions based on what we THINK we see and THINK we know. It is what it is i guess.
Relationships: One thing the beach did show me was the power of spending time with those we care about. It was evident all around me that people were truly happy spending time with one another. Nothing else would have brought them as much happiness at that moment. I saw friends laughing and playing sports together, a mother and son teamed up in a water balloon toss game, and family sat around and shared stories and remembered all of the other times they laughed together, sure to add this memory to their repertoire. Relationships are processes, you must stay at them to make them work. If you take them for granted, you will lose them and those you care the most about. Sometimes relationships change, for better or worse, but it is up to each person to make the best out of what they can. If a relationship is unhealthy, you work to make it healthy for both. If you cannot, then you must walk away. Period. I know I have a renewed sense of appreciation for relationships and what they mean. Today on the beach reminded me of this. Also, I really do hope my friendship above can be maintained, but I am happy to see it change if it makes it the best it can be for the both of us.
I hope this was a coherent rant, for it was a rant. You can't call it anything else. At the very least, I hope you didn't feel it was a waste of a few minutes. I know it helps me to get this out, so maybe it will help someone else if they read it... :)
Welly's out for another day...
Friday, January 7, 2011
Reflections for the Year 2011
Welly is back with some thoughts on what 2011 might be like. It could be full of twists and turns and may even surprise us all. But who really knows what is in store for you, me, your friends, and your loved ones. However, there are some things that we can all do to make 2011 the best it can be for us. Here are my new year resolutions for 2011 that I hope will serve me well and lead me to more prosperity and happiness:
Welly's out.
- It's okay to take "me" time! I have heard countless times that people need to devote themselves to their significant others to be happy. I don't agree with that. I think people must make sure they are happy and balanced in all facets of life, before they can truly serve and be there for others. Personally speaking, I had let my physical health deteriorate since my university days in Canada. I gained weight with my wife when she was pregnant, and kept on doing so for 6 years after that! This December, I made me first serious commitment to getting leaner and more fit and it has been a major success so far. Not only do I look better, but i feel better too. It has had a major impact on other areas of my life. Don't get me wrong, I strongly believe that one should serve those in need and help society in general to be better off. But it takes a healthy self first, before you can truly be your best when serving others.
- Appreciate the here and now. There has been many moments in my life when I have felt as though my life was passing me by. It was like I was on auto-pilot, moving, but without any sense of being able to steer where I was going, or how fast I was traveling. Schedules and routine can be very useful and necessary, but sometimes you need to get off the treadmill. Treadmills are great for exercise, but you never move forward if you are always on them. Take a moment and step off. Appreciate what you have around you and take in the sights and smells of your journey. Sometimes, that may be as simple as getting up early and watching the sun rise over the water. Maybe it is taking a moment to appreciate those close to you. Stop and show them how you feel. Believe me when I say having a life plan is important, but don't be too busy for the here and now. You only get one chance to experience the present, don't let it slip by and then regret missing it.
- Create (or refine) your life plan. Life plan, goals, aspirations, whatever you want to call it, it doesn't matter, but you should always have a plan in terms of what you are striving for. The best way to create this is to break up your life into its various components. Think about your physical, mental, spiritual, career, family and love sectors. What is it that you wish to achieve (or maintain) in each of these spheres. People with a healthy balance make sure to address each of these areas, without overcompensating or neglecting any areas. This has been a challenge for me personally, as i feel a few of these areas have been left with little attention and guidance. No better time then the present to start remedying this situation. If you want some good inspiration, Robin Sharma, Stephen Covey and other leadership and motivational authors are great at helping you begin to set a clear path towards excellence in life.
- Live life by your values. I have faced many challenges in my life, and when I was younger, I decided to take the wrong path, the choice of less resistance, but it was usually the wrong thing to do. Instead of living by my core values, I acted against them. Afterward, I felt a nagging rotten feeling in the pit of my stomach. I knew I acted wrongly, and my body and soul was telling me so. Over time, I have strengthened my determination to live life by my values, not willing to compromise who I am and what I stand for. It may mean facing unfair scrutiny and being seen as an outlier as you stand alone at times. But if you act within your values, you will be at peace with yourself. Remember, who do you spend the most time with... you of course!
- Have fun! What needs to be said here... live life to the fullest. Take time to enjoy your loved ones and the pleasures of life. Life isn't worth living if you cannot enjoy it.
Welly's out.
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